This piece explored and exposed the topic of addiction. I subtly exposed my own struggle with alcohol. I rarely drank but when I did, I binged. It was ruining my life in some ways. Changing who I was and leaving parts of my life blackened. A downward spiral that wasn’t working for me. The title was actually in German, as it was thee name of the Einsterzende Neubauten song I was performing to and the impetus for this piece… “Selbstportrait mit Kater”
Hence, not many understood the underlying theme…and in one performance, the audience actually laughed as the MC introduced me. That was hard to swallow right before I went on stage, but alas, I did and expressed myself most authentically without hesitation. I hold no ill will to that audience. I can understand their laughter and the MC’s interpretation…however, for me, it was a very serious and deep piece and a source of pain at the inner most of my core…I walk myself through the places and spaces of outward anger and frustration - from ignoring and avoiding, to awareness and pain…
Link to Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ggcIbONTfc